30 May 2009
UA’s
Earlier this month I realized that I was called for UA’s )peeing in a cup) 3 times in 20 days, which is mathematically impossible if I am on the once a month program. I went in and talked to them, long story short the woman 6 months ago (my case manager) made a mistake and put me on the wrong program so I was dropping twice a month.
The funny thing is my case manager is an umpa lumpa with the personality of dried cow dung. She mopes around the office, never smiling never showing any life aside from breathing and letting out what I imagine is her specifies mating cal of “umphhh”. She is the type of person if she spontaneously combusted, everyone would look around, and not realize she was gone for 3 weeks.
IT takes two days, but finally everything is cleared up. During this time she never once talked to me directly, we would be in the same room and she would say to someone else “tell him...” meanwhile we are 4 feet apart, and I can hear every word. Its like when you are 5 and are mad at your best friend. I understand people screw up (hence why I have alcohol monitoring to begin with) but she never was said “sorry I screwed up” she starts with a story about how my PO said wanted me on 2 etc. This I call her out n since when I was assigned the color I did not have a PO I had a piece of paper from the court saying 1 UA a month.. She class my PO to “verify” its only once a month and my PO says yes, just like the court ordered paperwork says.
Dilutes
UA’s are a touchy subject with my PO, they have led to many an argument since mine come back diluted because I drink too much water. I have offered giving blood etc but the newest is if I have another dilute I will get (drummer roll please) assigned more UA’s! This is the genius of the judicial system, there is a reason these people are not working for NASA!
The PO Meeting
I missed my meeting 2 weeks ago due to my crash, and not having the money to go to the meeting. My meeting was then changed to yesterday. I felt ok going in though I figured an argument would ensue about the UA’s. I go into the office and the first thing I hear is...
PO: “What did you just give up on your monitoring or want to kill trees?”
She has a stack of sheets from place I go blow, and do classes.
Me: “What are you talking about?”
PO: “I have a stack here saying you haven’t been doing anything”
Me: “I go there everyday, there aren’t any issues.”
She now takes the time read (yes I spoke correctly) the faxes. She yells at me and THEN decides maybe she should read the faxes to see what they say... again there is a reason these people aren’t working in NASA.
Turns out BI double faxed everything so half of them are duplicates and can be tossed. The others are nothing a letter saying I had an excused absence from class (due to the crash) a dilute UA (which we had discussed on the phone 2 weeks prior) a DRS saying I finished one of my classes. Of that stack of papers there was no alarm.
BA’s
The meeting continues she takes my money etc, and I ask to have my breathalyzers lowered since in 6 months have never blown hot, she agrees, and no I only blow 12 times a month instead of every single day. S I call in everyday to see f my colors are called (1 for UA and 1 for BA) if they are I go in and do my thing. This is huge since today is the first day in 6 months I don’t have to go in and blow or pee. Not to mention at $4 dollars a piece, it saves me $80 a month.
It almost appears the end might actually come
The lowered BA’s is huge, combined with the end of next month I will have another class completed saving me another $100 a month. It almost seems like I might get out of this without going back to jail. Hopefully the end of July I can get my BA’s lowered again, and maybe by the 1 year anniversary (September) I will only have some classes to finish up. The only hang up is...
Community Service
This office is filled with the creme ala creme of mental retards. I have called an left messages 6 times... no return call. I have left in each message my new address.... they still mail things to my old address. These people aren’t working at NASA for a reason. Hell these are the people who Wal-mart turned down as greeters, because they could not remember the line “welcome to Wal-mart”. Pictures of these people should be used by the Trojan company to promote safe sex. Finally the best part of these humans ran down their mom’s leg and ended up as a stain on the mattress.
I can not do my community service because the due date has passed, BUT I can not get an extension or assigned more hours etc because they will not o their jobs and get me an extension letter or a letter stating I need to perform more hours.
This is my final stumbling block, that and a MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) panel which I just need to get really drunk and go to one night, ha ha ha. Which I will get that taken care of this month its just a matter of going, and paying money because thats what the whole judicial system comes down to, those who have money pay and aren’t n trouble the poor pay through the nose every spare cent.
Quick note
I am still sober which is... 7 weeks. I have a bunch of other stuff to post, but have been busy so keep posted.
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Sunday, May 17, 2009
John fall down go boom
17 May 2009
I went to the library, got my official Denver library card, grabbed a book, it was the beginning to a great Sunday afternoon. As I walked into the library I decided I should sign up for my community service, and there is a place down the street where I know a few people doing their time. I head down broadway cruising along enjoying the scenery.
I was cruising along I would guess 17-18 MPH, I had my hands resting on the handlebars, not gripping them, just resting on top like I usually ride. I hit a pot hole went flying forward catching myself on the handlebars with my stomach, i started to regain control, and went BOOM.
I jumped up, as only I would... laughing. The homeless guy who watched it happen summed it up in one word “ouch”. The first thing I do? inspect Betty! Betty is fine and well, she is a little shaken up, and in need of new handlebar tape but with a little rest she will be fine. I was a couple of blocks from where my friend Brandi was working so I stopped in there to wash up, and inspect my damages.
I get there, and lock up my bike, and people start asking if I am alright, at this point I am starting to think maybe it is worse than I thought. I walk in to see Brandi and her co-workers starting asking if I am alright, Brandi knew exactly what was up, grabbed me some paper towels and led my to the bathroom. I finished cleaning up, when when of her GENIUS co-workers says I should put alcohol on it... they don’t have any (thank you!). Nope they found it... OUCH is one way of putting it... the worse were my arms, but yeah it did not tickle.
As I am finishing up Brandi says I now owe her an ice cream, and her co-workers jump in that I owe all of them ice cream. I agree adding in “except for the one who suggested the alcohol, she doesn’t get ice cream”.
I have road rash under my left eye, a fat lip, a little more rash on my chin, my left shoulder, left leg and both forearms are a little torn up. I am not 100% but I had to of gotten my hands back on the handlebars in time since the palms of my hands are fine. I have scrapes on the backs of my hands which would mean I got them back on in time. I am fine, a little bruised is all the tragedy being now I can’t get tattooed Wednesday since I tore up the area a bit.
After washing up I decided to go home instead of doing the community service thing, I will save that for later in the week.
Ask a gay dude
17 May 2009
I loved the Chappelle show, he was a genius! He had a skit called “ask a black dude” and one called “ask a gay dude” where people would ask the embarrassing questions everyone wanted to know, but would never ask. I have a question for “ask a gay dude” why do gay guys have that voice? Each and everyone of you know the voice I am talking about. I am not saying ALL gay guys do, but the ones which there is no need for “gaydar” it simple logic.
I was walking into blow this morning, and there is a person entering the building talking on their cute bluetooth device , and I hear... the voice. I have no qualms with gays, hell leaves more chicks for me! I hear the voice and notice he is wearing a hat which on the back says (I shit you not) “cock fight” I found this very humorous, but then I began to ponder. Who A) makes such a garment B) Who owns such a garment?
This brought on a second question for “ask a gay dude“ why do some gay guys have such great fashion sense and some CLEARLY do not? I dress like a 15 year old kid, t-shirt shorts, I have NO sense of fashion. I do know however that baggy gray sweat pants and a blue and white track coat with a ”cock fight“ hat (red) and those gay brown sandal/sailor type shoes is not the height of fashion... or is it? If it is I am worse off than I ever thought, and there is a reason why I am not getting lucky with the ladies. I am 99% certain that this is something seen on ”What not to wear“.
There are straight guys with fashion sense some with a little and through the bell curve you go... but for gay guys it seems to be to the ”t“ or train wreck, why is this? Is it a way to prove they are gay like the rainbow sticker? This way one you are scoping for dudes you can be like terrible, terrible sense of fashion he is gay... or way too nicely dressed to be straight?
I loved the Chappelle show, he was a genius! He had a skit called “ask a black dude” and one called “ask a gay dude” where people would ask the embarrassing questions everyone wanted to know, but would never ask. I have a question for “ask a gay dude” why do gay guys have that voice? Each and everyone of you know the voice I am talking about. I am not saying ALL gay guys do, but the ones which there is no need for “gaydar” it simple logic.
I was walking into blow this morning, and there is a person entering the building talking on their cute bluetooth device , and I hear... the voice. I have no qualms with gays, hell leaves more chicks for me! I hear the voice and notice he is wearing a hat which on the back says (I shit you not) “cock fight” I found this very humorous, but then I began to ponder. Who A) makes such a garment B) Who owns such a garment?
This brought on a second question for “ask a gay dude“ why do some gay guys have such great fashion sense and some CLEARLY do not? I dress like a 15 year old kid, t-shirt shorts, I have NO sense of fashion. I do know however that baggy gray sweat pants and a blue and white track coat with a ”cock fight“ hat (red) and those gay brown sandal/sailor type shoes is not the height of fashion... or is it? If it is I am worse off than I ever thought, and there is a reason why I am not getting lucky with the ladies. I am 99% certain that this is something seen on ”What not to wear“.
There are straight guys with fashion sense some with a little and through the bell curve you go... but for gay guys it seems to be to the ”t“ or train wreck, why is this? Is it a way to prove they are gay like the rainbow sticker? This way one you are scoping for dudes you can be like terrible, terrible sense of fashion he is gay... or way too nicely dressed to be straight?
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Pulled over
16 May 2009
Yesterday I was heading out for a bike ride, and on the way I stopped to do my daily breathalyzer. I leave an extra lock locked up outside the building just for days when I am stopping by n my way on a ride as opposed to my way home from work. I blow, and receive a few jokes from the counter staff about my lovely cycling attire. I have noticed that for a state with such a massive number of cyclist people in downtown are surprised to see people in lycra. Also, I have never seen anyone else in Lycra cutting through downtown, I wouldn’t except it makes sense that I pass the place on my way out for a bike ride.
I get out of the building and head down the sidewalk on Welton, this part will be tough for non-Denverites. Directly south is the 16th Street Mall, which is a pedestrian mall no bikes allowed on the street or sidewalk except for Sunday. I get to the corner and there is a cop in a cruiser about to continue down the mall and he yells “get off your bike” as I enter the 16th St. sidewalk. I ignore this since once he passes I am intending on riding on the street. He passes and I start riding down Welton, the wrong way on a one way. There are no cars coming and I am going but a block. What do I hear next? I siren. I look back and here comes the cop full speed, lights flashing, siren blaring and was comical. I stop 20 feet from the turn, and he pulls up beside me as I utter “you got to be fucking kidding me”.
Cop: “Did you hear me tell you to get off your bike back there?”
Me: “No”
Cop: “You are going the wrong way down a one way”
Me: “I am just hoping on to 15th St.” (not 20 feet away)
Cop: “You have to follow the same rules as a vehicle, you can’t be riding against traffic”
Me: “but you can?”
Cop: “In the name of public safety”
Me: “Yes, you speeding the wrong way”
The cop interrupts me before I get myself into more trouble“
Cop: ”You have to follow the same laws, this is why we end up scraping you people off the street“
I wanted to make a ”you people“ remark but bit my tongue. Now apparently cyclists are a lesser race (terrible pun intended). I was waiting for him to call me boy next, and to sit on the back of the bus.
Cop: ”So, you didn’t hear me tell you to get off your bike back there?“
Me: ”No sir“
Cop: ”Really? because I was only this far away from you“
Me: ”No“ (being sure to look him straight in the eyes)
Cop: ”Really?“
I was waiting for him to do the Larry David stare and face exam.
Me: ”No, sorry“
Cop: ”Ok, well remember the traffic laws are for your safety“
Me: ”yup“
I get on the sidewalk , ride 20 feet and enter traffic on 15th street, with the cop. I make a point to ride right beside the cop the entire way down 15th, though this meant stopping and waiting at red lights. Finally he decides to change lanes, with out a blinker... he stops at the next light, and I pull up next to him and say ”I think your blinker is out sir, because when you changed lanes I did...“ he gives me a look which screamed... I wish this was 1970 so I could beat the living piss out of you. He then turned right onto a side street... with no blinker.
Epilogue
I know he had every right to pull me over, and I was less than cooperative, but I find this interesting. I have always shown cops a great deal of respect, and aside from my DUI’s never had any trouble. Even when I was pulled over for my DUI’s I did not give them crap, I knew I was wrong and said ”yes sir, and no sir“. I am intrigued by my more recent hatred of the police. Which I think seeing them harass the homeless in my neighborhood, the fact that 30 of them sit on ass on the 16th street mall all day long.
I can completely see how people become career criminals, the jail system is a joke, and you are let out with no money. no job, nothing. Unless you have family, or money waiting on the outside you are screwed. While I was in I got work release for part of my sentence which made it possible to pay my rent etc, and I had luckily just got a new credit card in the mail a week before my arrest. If these two things had not happened I would have defaulted on my rent, they would have seized my belongings making it nearly impossible to rent another place. If it was not for the credit card I would not of been able to pay my rent, set up a new apartment, or basic toiletries (they are not supplied on the ”light side“ aka work release). I was working a shitty job which barely paid my rent for y jail... yes on work release you have to pay rent to the sheriffs office..
A hypothetical... I got a year (which the DA was pushing for) with no work release. I would have defaulted on my rent, my credit cards would be cancelled and I would have that on my credit report. Any money in my accounts would have been overdrawn via netflix, and other electronic deductions. I would be released, and have nothing but the clothes in my back. I would be lying if I said I would not consider stealing. Yes get a job at McDonalds and rebuild your life is always possible but that is a long long road. Stealing for fast cash, is quick easy and worst case you end up in jail, with free food and free board.
I have no intention in going back to jail but I truly believe the system creates more criminals than it deters. If my sentence had been 1 month longer I would have been screwed no way to pay rent for my apartment in Longmont, maxed out credit cards and no cash. I was lucky, I am sure for basically law abiding people like myself jail does the scared straight thing enough to keep them from coming back, but for the vast majority I think it creates repeat criminals, which learn bigger and better methods while in jail.
Now go watch Shawshank Redemption ;)
Yesterday I was heading out for a bike ride, and on the way I stopped to do my daily breathalyzer. I leave an extra lock locked up outside the building just for days when I am stopping by n my way on a ride as opposed to my way home from work. I blow, and receive a few jokes from the counter staff about my lovely cycling attire. I have noticed that for a state with such a massive number of cyclist people in downtown are surprised to see people in lycra. Also, I have never seen anyone else in Lycra cutting through downtown, I wouldn’t except it makes sense that I pass the place on my way out for a bike ride.
I get out of the building and head down the sidewalk on Welton, this part will be tough for non-Denverites. Directly south is the 16th Street Mall, which is a pedestrian mall no bikes allowed on the street or sidewalk except for Sunday. I get to the corner and there is a cop in a cruiser about to continue down the mall and he yells “get off your bike” as I enter the 16th St. sidewalk. I ignore this since once he passes I am intending on riding on the street. He passes and I start riding down Welton, the wrong way on a one way. There are no cars coming and I am going but a block. What do I hear next? I siren. I look back and here comes the cop full speed, lights flashing, siren blaring and was comical. I stop 20 feet from the turn, and he pulls up beside me as I utter “you got to be fucking kidding me”.
Cop: “Did you hear me tell you to get off your bike back there?”
Me: “No”
Cop: “You are going the wrong way down a one way”
Me: “I am just hoping on to 15th St.” (not 20 feet away)
Cop: “You have to follow the same rules as a vehicle, you can’t be riding against traffic”
Me: “but you can?”
Cop: “In the name of public safety”
Me: “Yes, you speeding the wrong way”
The cop interrupts me before I get myself into more trouble“
Cop: ”You have to follow the same laws, this is why we end up scraping you people off the street“
I wanted to make a ”you people“ remark but bit my tongue. Now apparently cyclists are a lesser race (terrible pun intended). I was waiting for him to call me boy next, and to sit on the back of the bus.
Cop: ”So, you didn’t hear me tell you to get off your bike back there?“
Me: ”No sir“
Cop: ”Really? because I was only this far away from you“
Me: ”No“ (being sure to look him straight in the eyes)
Cop: ”Really?“
I was waiting for him to do the Larry David stare and face exam.
Me: ”No, sorry“
Cop: ”Ok, well remember the traffic laws are for your safety“
Me: ”yup“
I get on the sidewalk , ride 20 feet and enter traffic on 15th street, with the cop. I make a point to ride right beside the cop the entire way down 15th, though this meant stopping and waiting at red lights. Finally he decides to change lanes, with out a blinker... he stops at the next light, and I pull up next to him and say ”I think your blinker is out sir, because when you changed lanes I did...“ he gives me a look which screamed... I wish this was 1970 so I could beat the living piss out of you. He then turned right onto a side street... with no blinker.
Epilogue
I know he had every right to pull me over, and I was less than cooperative, but I find this interesting. I have always shown cops a great deal of respect, and aside from my DUI’s never had any trouble. Even when I was pulled over for my DUI’s I did not give them crap, I knew I was wrong and said ”yes sir, and no sir“. I am intrigued by my more recent hatred of the police. Which I think seeing them harass the homeless in my neighborhood, the fact that 30 of them sit on ass on the 16th street mall all day long.
I can completely see how people become career criminals, the jail system is a joke, and you are let out with no money. no job, nothing. Unless you have family, or money waiting on the outside you are screwed. While I was in I got work release for part of my sentence which made it possible to pay my rent etc, and I had luckily just got a new credit card in the mail a week before my arrest. If these two things had not happened I would have defaulted on my rent, they would have seized my belongings making it nearly impossible to rent another place. If it was not for the credit card I would not of been able to pay my rent, set up a new apartment, or basic toiletries (they are not supplied on the ”light side“ aka work release). I was working a shitty job which barely paid my rent for y jail... yes on work release you have to pay rent to the sheriffs office..
A hypothetical... I got a year (which the DA was pushing for) with no work release. I would have defaulted on my rent, my credit cards would be cancelled and I would have that on my credit report. Any money in my accounts would have been overdrawn via netflix, and other electronic deductions. I would be released, and have nothing but the clothes in my back. I would be lying if I said I would not consider stealing. Yes get a job at McDonalds and rebuild your life is always possible but that is a long long road. Stealing for fast cash, is quick easy and worst case you end up in jail, with free food and free board.
I have no intention in going back to jail but I truly believe the system creates more criminals than it deters. If my sentence had been 1 month longer I would have been screwed no way to pay rent for my apartment in Longmont, maxed out credit cards and no cash. I was lucky, I am sure for basically law abiding people like myself jail does the scared straight thing enough to keep them from coming back, but for the vast majority I think it creates repeat criminals, which learn bigger and better methods while in jail.
Now go watch Shawshank Redemption ;)
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
The return to racing
13 May 2009
Saturday I missed the start of the race, I had a basic idea where I need to go but, got lost a few times, and had a flat tire. I managed to bump into a few guys riding to the race, and rode the last leg with them, and got another flat with a half mile left. When I did arrive my race under way, I watched the race, and fixed my tire. I did sing up for the license so now I am setup t race again.
As I was leaving the race I had 90 minutes to go 20+ miles back to downtown in order to blow for the day. As I began riding back, I get another flat... yes the third of the day. I swap the tube for one of the slower leakers from earlier and ride back as fast as I can. As I get downtown the rear tire is completely flat, but I make it to blow in time, and limp the final bit home.
Sunday
I was supposed to meet some people for a ride who cancelled due to the rain. I was already riding to meet them, and since I was already wet, figured I would just keep riding. I took it easy riding the bike paths exploring, getting lost and eventually making it home. Overall I got in a little over 100 miles between the two days which was great.
I am looking forward to racing, but really need to get more miles in my legs. My issues now is I have been working 445-2 thus giving me overtime which will help pay for racing, and getting me out of debt. The flip side of this is by the time Wednesday come around to ride I am too tired. I got home today sat down, and woke up 2 hours later, half undressed in the process of getting ready for a ride. I am thinking/hoping this is temporary as my body gets used to regular exercise, and the new work schedule..
Drinking
I have not drank in 32 days, so just over a month. I have actually had no issues except my love for sugar which I have started cutting back on which may also be part of my fatigue. I had class last night, and long story short, there is the idea by some shrink conglomerate that you do not reach adulthood until 24-26. This is based on your brain finally finishing its last stages of development. There a few stages between birth leading to adulthood (clearly) and the theory is when you start using you disrupt your development to a degree, and you get sort of stuck in that stage. Maybe not get stuck but it slows your development and its more difficult to move on since brain can’t move on because its high etc.
I am clearly butchering their work but the premise is I started drinking and using drugs at 14. I found this interesting because I have always said I am a 15 year old stuck in a 31 year old body. This actually gives a little reasoning for why this might be the case. If I stay sober there is hope I might actually become an adult at some point in the future.
Saturday I missed the start of the race, I had a basic idea where I need to go but, got lost a few times, and had a flat tire. I managed to bump into a few guys riding to the race, and rode the last leg with them, and got another flat with a half mile left. When I did arrive my race under way, I watched the race, and fixed my tire. I did sing up for the license so now I am setup t race again.
As I was leaving the race I had 90 minutes to go 20+ miles back to downtown in order to blow for the day. As I began riding back, I get another flat... yes the third of the day. I swap the tube for one of the slower leakers from earlier and ride back as fast as I can. As I get downtown the rear tire is completely flat, but I make it to blow in time, and limp the final bit home.
Sunday
I was supposed to meet some people for a ride who cancelled due to the rain. I was already riding to meet them, and since I was already wet, figured I would just keep riding. I took it easy riding the bike paths exploring, getting lost and eventually making it home. Overall I got in a little over 100 miles between the two days which was great.
I am looking forward to racing, but really need to get more miles in my legs. My issues now is I have been working 445-2 thus giving me overtime which will help pay for racing, and getting me out of debt. The flip side of this is by the time Wednesday come around to ride I am too tired. I got home today sat down, and woke up 2 hours later, half undressed in the process of getting ready for a ride. I am thinking/hoping this is temporary as my body gets used to regular exercise, and the new work schedule..
Drinking
I have not drank in 32 days, so just over a month. I have actually had no issues except my love for sugar which I have started cutting back on which may also be part of my fatigue. I had class last night, and long story short, there is the idea by some shrink conglomerate that you do not reach adulthood until 24-26. This is based on your brain finally finishing its last stages of development. There a few stages between birth leading to adulthood (clearly) and the theory is when you start using you disrupt your development to a degree, and you get sort of stuck in that stage. Maybe not get stuck but it slows your development and its more difficult to move on since brain can’t move on because its high etc.
I am clearly butchering their work but the premise is I started drinking and using drugs at 14. I found this interesting because I have always said I am a 15 year old stuck in a 31 year old body. This actually gives a little reasoning for why this might be the case. If I stay sober there is hope I might actually become an adult at some point in the future.
Friday, May 8, 2009
I am racing... tomorrow
8 May 2009
I decided I am going to race, and well why not tomorrow right? I mean I have not trained, am in terrible shape, and don’t have the money. None of these things have stopped me before, I did a 3 day stage race with $25.00 and lived in the back of my car, why not a crit when I am in no shape?
Part of me is doing the race as a lyptus test of my fitness, the other part figures if nothing else it will be a hell of a work out. Otherwise the little man in the Sudan put it very eloquently “its better than going to AA”. Which goes with out saying, but he does have a way of putting it in perspective. I will write about my race this weekend, unless it goes really badly, at which point I will delete this post, and pretend I never talked, or went to the race .
I decided I am going to race, and well why not tomorrow right? I mean I have not trained, am in terrible shape, and don’t have the money. None of these things have stopped me before, I did a 3 day stage race with $25.00 and lived in the back of my car, why not a crit when I am in no shape?
Part of me is doing the race as a lyptus test of my fitness, the other part figures if nothing else it will be a hell of a work out. Otherwise the little man in the Sudan put it very eloquently “its better than going to AA”. Which goes with out saying, but he does have a way of putting it in perspective. I will write about my race this weekend, unless it goes really badly, at which point I will delete this post, and pretend I never talked, or went to the race .
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
My Return
5 May 2009
I have decided to race again, yes I am 5 months late to make this decision, but better late than never. I have been in contact with a few teams, I will be riding with in order to see if I qualify. Yes, out here you basically try out for teams even at the lowest categories. I am in no shape to race currently but I am going to start training, and hitting what races I can in the hopes to peak for cross season in October. The only main issue is I need to get a cross bike in order to race cross... only a minor obstacle which like everything else goes away with money.
My ability to afford a bike in time for August September is a very real issue BUT hopefully through scouring craigslist/ebay talking to teammates etc I can get parts and then its just dropping 400 on a frame which I can pull off... in theory.
While at jury duty today, I was reading the training bible, and recognized a few things, and are slowly putting together a training plan etc. I found my major weakness right now is my diet. I eat way too much sugar and carbs which I need to start working on.
I have decided to race again, yes I am 5 months late to make this decision, but better late than never. I have been in contact with a few teams, I will be riding with in order to see if I qualify. Yes, out here you basically try out for teams even at the lowest categories. I am in no shape to race currently but I am going to start training, and hitting what races I can in the hopes to peak for cross season in October. The only main issue is I need to get a cross bike in order to race cross... only a minor obstacle which like everything else goes away with money.
My ability to afford a bike in time for August September is a very real issue BUT hopefully through scouring craigslist/ebay talking to teammates etc I can get parts and then its just dropping 400 on a frame which I can pull off... in theory.
While at jury duty today, I was reading the training bible, and recognized a few things, and are slowly putting together a training plan etc. I found my major weakness right now is my diet. I eat way too much sugar and carbs which I need to start working on.
The judicial system revisited
5 May 2009
I had jury duty today, at every opportunity the judicial, and basically every government system goes above, and beyond the call of duty to show what a worthless, antiquated means to an end it truly is. Colorado law states that persons on probation are eligible to serve. So I sat wasting away in a room, which would fine and good except, my employer does not think my “civic duty” is an excuse to miss a days work. All the time spent staring at the wall, nodding off, and awaking to a puddle of drool on my lap means the next few days I have to work late... perfect. The true beauty is I was just called to hear a case, but of course they are not ready to do anything because its an hour before lunch. I luckily live 10 minutes from the courthouse, so am home writing.
What is going to be wonderful, is when I return at 130 and am finally lead into the court where they start figuring out who will actually hear the case etc I am going to say I am on probation, think the system is a joke, and regardless of any evidence put forth they are innocent because jail sucks (though I don’t really believe that last bit). I will be relieved of my duties, BUT NOT before wasting my entire day.
How do solve this issue. Everyone get your heads out of your asses! I will draw a comparison... You show up to work, as an electrician but there are no jobs just waiting on an “ok”. After a few hours your boss says we have the job, go to the house, check it out. You go, and waste more time looking at a framed home, but there are no supplies, so you can’t do anything. You wait around for the supplies, when they finally come thy gave you the wrong order, and there is nothing you can use. The day is over you got nothing done. Your boss would not stay in business very long if he had to pay guys to sit and wait, right?
How do we fix the system? Run it like a business with a purpose. You call the night before and they say you have been assigned to room 400 (as opposed to sitting and waiting to see if you will be drawn). This would delay cases a day but that could be figured out beforehand, like the afternoon before as opposed to that morning. Prior to this you filled out a questionnaire in which you say I am a racist, a sexist a penguin, and a animal lover, assuring you will not be chosen. Those who actually believe in the system go in, the court is ready to go, and off to the races.
The amount of time, man power, energy, that is wasted ASTOUNDS me! They have a person sitting up front just waiting to call juror numbers... this is a full time job. The computer randomly picks the numbers, she just says “1310” and waits for someone to say “here”. I am sure she makes as much if not more than myself. Walking to the bathroom there are offices filled with people, and officers WAITING for stuff to do, I went to the bathroom 3 times, and all three times there were 4 officers sitting on ass waiting to move a prisoner.... Do they get paid by the prisoner? NO! They are pulling a full salary and sitting on ass.
Ok... for those of you who want to rant and rave about how cops are need etc, and put their lives on the line etc before you say a word my father was a cop for over 30 years. I have thousands of stories where he just like every other cop sat on ass doing nothing, Where he was a cop there were SEVERAL people who would bring portable DVD players into work so while doing radar they could watch movies. That is but a snowflake on the tip of an iceberg folks. For every officer killed in the line of duty there are hundreds who just collect a good days pay.
All the guards in jail, walked around zapped a little thing on the cell to prove they were there, and went into their little shelter and played on the computer. They would have to give us are lunch and tell us to go back to our cells at specific times. No one fought since it was not worth losing your good time, and those who did end up fighting, the guards were never around at the time. Mind you this is not San Quentin, BUT they are pulling a full salary and did very little work. The point being, if I walked around, and played on my phone for 15 minutes at work I would be fired.
I think a lot of good reform could come to government if they saw the other side of things, how the poor work, and live. How aggravating it is to call in regards to do anything, and never hearing anything back. What it is like to be a poor slob who has to work around schedules of offices open from 8-12 closed for an hour lunch and then open 1-4. I have NEVER had a job with a one hour lunch, my current job we get a single 20 minute break. I have a good job, but I think all government offices should really be run like business’ and not like the fat sloth it has become wasting everyone’s time and energy. I now have to work 10 hours the rest of the week to keep from getting fired, because a judge and some lawyers took 3 hours to decide they needed a jury, decided a 2 hour lunch was needed.
Jury Selection
First 18 were selected told a bunch of stuff etc reasonable doubt and so forth. 12 were then picked to sit, and a little questionnaire goes around that you read, Name, Age, job etc, any relatives in law enforcement Ding, Ding, Ding. They went through the 12 of us, and then the DA has a chance to talk and ask questions. Asked me about my dad, how many cops I knew etc. I made a point to toss my run in with the law, which he was keen about since I was prosecuted by the Boulder DA. At this point I knew I was out. The defense attorney asked me 20 questions in regards to my father, etc. I was not selected but lost an entire day due to this entire thing.
I knew I would get out of it if it was a criminal case, or due to my father it was a matter of what time I was going home. All in all I think it was a cool experience but the amount of time and energy wasted astounds me. My disqualification could have easily been weeded out hours earlier, as well as a women who is breast feeding a child and has to pump at certain times of the day, the woman who was half deaf, or the guy with a flight to Chicago this evening. These things all could be seen and addressed in the morning, or prior to arriving this morning, With all of the information at everyone’s finger tips you would think triggers would be set off prior to the day of the case. The computer system knew I was a resident of Denver County, can it not cross reference with cases? Family ties? With the case of the hard of hearing woman, she has gone through this the last 3 years, and every time dismissed due to her hearing and fear she might miss key points. Why can this not be stored so she is not burdened with showing up again, since her hearing is not coming back. I was arrested 6 months ago, no mater how impartial you view it, that has bearing. The DA asked me have you ever heard of a cop making a mistake, I said “yes, they are human.” He asked would I be completely impartial, and I responded “I would like to think so, but being through the system I have my doubts.”
When I went to court I was in shackles, and a orange jumpsuit, how would ANYONE EVER be presumed innocent in such a garb? My case did not go to jury, but something has to be said that while giving my side of the story I was shackled, looking a little rough from 4 days in jail, and had a guard standing behind me. Judges, cops, lawyers are all human and all these things click for them, the idea of entering as an equal and innocent is ludicrous, In this case the defendant had a suit on, was well dressed, and looked clean cut. I thought by going straight to trial and getting it over with was a better way than wasting the courts time, I would beg to differ now. I should have waited and gotten a suit like O.J.’s because that tailor makes a fine looking set of threads.
I had jury duty today, at every opportunity the judicial, and basically every government system goes above, and beyond the call of duty to show what a worthless, antiquated means to an end it truly is. Colorado law states that persons on probation are eligible to serve. So I sat wasting away in a room, which would fine and good except, my employer does not think my “civic duty” is an excuse to miss a days work. All the time spent staring at the wall, nodding off, and awaking to a puddle of drool on my lap means the next few days I have to work late... perfect. The true beauty is I was just called to hear a case, but of course they are not ready to do anything because its an hour before lunch. I luckily live 10 minutes from the courthouse, so am home writing.
What is going to be wonderful, is when I return at 130 and am finally lead into the court where they start figuring out who will actually hear the case etc I am going to say I am on probation, think the system is a joke, and regardless of any evidence put forth they are innocent because jail sucks (though I don’t really believe that last bit). I will be relieved of my duties, BUT NOT before wasting my entire day.
How do solve this issue. Everyone get your heads out of your asses! I will draw a comparison... You show up to work, as an electrician but there are no jobs just waiting on an “ok”. After a few hours your boss says we have the job, go to the house, check it out. You go, and waste more time looking at a framed home, but there are no supplies, so you can’t do anything. You wait around for the supplies, when they finally come thy gave you the wrong order, and there is nothing you can use. The day is over you got nothing done. Your boss would not stay in business very long if he had to pay guys to sit and wait, right?
How do we fix the system? Run it like a business with a purpose. You call the night before and they say you have been assigned to room 400 (as opposed to sitting and waiting to see if you will be drawn). This would delay cases a day but that could be figured out beforehand, like the afternoon before as opposed to that morning. Prior to this you filled out a questionnaire in which you say I am a racist, a sexist a penguin, and a animal lover, assuring you will not be chosen. Those who actually believe in the system go in, the court is ready to go, and off to the races.
The amount of time, man power, energy, that is wasted ASTOUNDS me! They have a person sitting up front just waiting to call juror numbers... this is a full time job. The computer randomly picks the numbers, she just says “1310” and waits for someone to say “here”. I am sure she makes as much if not more than myself. Walking to the bathroom there are offices filled with people, and officers WAITING for stuff to do, I went to the bathroom 3 times, and all three times there were 4 officers sitting on ass waiting to move a prisoner.... Do they get paid by the prisoner? NO! They are pulling a full salary and sitting on ass.
Ok... for those of you who want to rant and rave about how cops are need etc, and put their lives on the line etc before you say a word my father was a cop for over 30 years. I have thousands of stories where he just like every other cop sat on ass doing nothing, Where he was a cop there were SEVERAL people who would bring portable DVD players into work so while doing radar they could watch movies. That is but a snowflake on the tip of an iceberg folks. For every officer killed in the line of duty there are hundreds who just collect a good days pay.
All the guards in jail, walked around zapped a little thing on the cell to prove they were there, and went into their little shelter and played on the computer. They would have to give us are lunch and tell us to go back to our cells at specific times. No one fought since it was not worth losing your good time, and those who did end up fighting, the guards were never around at the time. Mind you this is not San Quentin, BUT they are pulling a full salary and did very little work. The point being, if I walked around, and played on my phone for 15 minutes at work I would be fired.
I think a lot of good reform could come to government if they saw the other side of things, how the poor work, and live. How aggravating it is to call in regards to do anything, and never hearing anything back. What it is like to be a poor slob who has to work around schedules of offices open from 8-12 closed for an hour lunch and then open 1-4. I have NEVER had a job with a one hour lunch, my current job we get a single 20 minute break. I have a good job, but I think all government offices should really be run like business’ and not like the fat sloth it has become wasting everyone’s time and energy. I now have to work 10 hours the rest of the week to keep from getting fired, because a judge and some lawyers took 3 hours to decide they needed a jury, decided a 2 hour lunch was needed.
Jury Selection
First 18 were selected told a bunch of stuff etc reasonable doubt and so forth. 12 were then picked to sit, and a little questionnaire goes around that you read, Name, Age, job etc, any relatives in law enforcement Ding, Ding, Ding. They went through the 12 of us, and then the DA has a chance to talk and ask questions. Asked me about my dad, how many cops I knew etc. I made a point to toss my run in with the law, which he was keen about since I was prosecuted by the Boulder DA. At this point I knew I was out. The defense attorney asked me 20 questions in regards to my father, etc. I was not selected but lost an entire day due to this entire thing.
I knew I would get out of it if it was a criminal case, or due to my father it was a matter of what time I was going home. All in all I think it was a cool experience but the amount of time and energy wasted astounds me. My disqualification could have easily been weeded out hours earlier, as well as a women who is breast feeding a child and has to pump at certain times of the day, the woman who was half deaf, or the guy with a flight to Chicago this evening. These things all could be seen and addressed in the morning, or prior to arriving this morning, With all of the information at everyone’s finger tips you would think triggers would be set off prior to the day of the case. The computer system knew I was a resident of Denver County, can it not cross reference with cases? Family ties? With the case of the hard of hearing woman, she has gone through this the last 3 years, and every time dismissed due to her hearing and fear she might miss key points. Why can this not be stored so she is not burdened with showing up again, since her hearing is not coming back. I was arrested 6 months ago, no mater how impartial you view it, that has bearing. The DA asked me have you ever heard of a cop making a mistake, I said “yes, they are human.” He asked would I be completely impartial, and I responded “I would like to think so, but being through the system I have my doubts.”
When I went to court I was in shackles, and a orange jumpsuit, how would ANYONE EVER be presumed innocent in such a garb? My case did not go to jury, but something has to be said that while giving my side of the story I was shackled, looking a little rough from 4 days in jail, and had a guard standing behind me. Judges, cops, lawyers are all human and all these things click for them, the idea of entering as an equal and innocent is ludicrous, In this case the defendant had a suit on, was well dressed, and looked clean cut. I thought by going straight to trial and getting it over with was a better way than wasting the courts time, I would beg to differ now. I should have waited and gotten a suit like O.J.’s because that tailor makes a fine looking set of threads.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Is this how sober people live?
3 May 2009
First off, I am still sober so 3 weeks now? I should really document the date better, I am thinking April 11th was my first day... I should have done it on New Years or something memorable, hmmm ok bender until Jan 30th YAY ha ha.
I actually had a wonderful weekend, gym, cleaning, yoga, cooking, work... all of which would have sounded like a terrible weekend in my drinking days! Today I was walking Jazmine through the park, and I was thinking about life etc, and I become hyper aware that I think about myself a lot now. Is this how people are? Thinking about your goals, and where you want t be etc? I am being serious... I can’t recall my previous sober days I think I was the same way. I like to think that its more the sense of hope, and looking forward to life instead of being self centered. In all seriousness is this what sober people do?
Racing
I am toying with racing, been looking into races, and so forth. I enjoy racing but hate how people take themselves so seriously at the events, people its CAT 4, and we are 30! No one is winning the race being signed by Astana and winning the Giro next season. I think it would be fun, ad give me an extra incentive to ride more, plus I really want to do cross this season so it will help me get in shape to do that in the fall. Cross seems a lot more fun since 2 laps into the race everyone is sort of in their own race instead on a huge pack jockeying for position its more broken up, where you are trying to beat the guy 50 yards a head of you. All the races I have been to have a much more jovial feel to them instead of the I am the next Lance super ego of road racing.
Goals
A few months ago I posted a few goals and really I forget what they are, and clearly they were not truly what I was looking to do with my life. I have since updated my goals list which most of them are easily obtainable.
1. There is a bike ride I found online, its not an organized ride or anything just a guy mapped his ride. It leaves from downtown Denver (5280 ft), meanders into the mountains and up Mount Evens (Highest paved road in North America at 14240 ft) its 134 miles I think and over 10,000 feet of climbing when said and done. I want to do it 3 times, July, August September once each month.
2. I want to be done with BA’s and UA’s by September 11th, I have SOME control over this goal. Staying clean, and blowing everyday, going to classes etc help, but its my PO’s decision not mine..
3. I want to be done with my therapy classes by December 14th, which if I go every week I should be done before that though I did not look to see what holidays etc might interfere, and post pone a week.
4. I want to be done with Relapse Prevention class on June 30th which if I do not miss any classes should be my final class.
5. Have my restitution paid off by September 11th 2010, I still owe 4500... but paying $400 a month in classes etc makes it tough to put money towards that debt.
Once my BA’s start dropping (hopefully the next PO meeting) I want to take the money would be
spending on that and put it into savings for either a new bike, or more than likely towards my
restitution so I can get that done and paid off.
More thoughts
I have difficulty with motivation, and purpose. Clarifying, I love to ride, but find I need a reason to go
for rides other than pleasure aka the desire to race. I went to yoga for the first time in two years, and
loved it, I really miss practicing, but again I need a reason other than enjoyment does that make any
sense? Most people love to hike, or yoga etc and go when they can, and if they miss a chance might
be disappointed. I find it difficult to be like I won’t ride today because I would rather hang out with
friends or my dog (which I did Wednesday) I feel though I am being lazy, but lazy of what? With no
goal to race etc, and really missing the ride is not going to transform my life, but I find it difficult not to
schedule everything. I am starting to try to organize everything, and do the daily planner thing which
I think is really an attempt to show I am in control of my life. That I am no longer being controlled or
manipulated by my vice of alcohol but really just by another vice either riding, or the gym, r climbing
etc. I have read quite a bit on alcoholism and recovery but do not recall ever seeing anything about
this though, to me it makes perfect sense.
Last note
Work has been going great been going in early 430-5 am which is when I have my best
concentration and leaving 1-2 which with Colorado Summers leaves me with 7+ hours of sunlight to
enjoy, it seems to be the perfect schedule for me. I have been staying sober, no real issues, really
no desire to drink, I can really tell the difference of life before compared to now. All the stupid little
things I missed like today, cooking chili, spring cleaning, yoga, walking Jazmine around the park,
Taking Jazmine to the ice cream parlor and having an ice cream, which I could have done all of
those things if I were a social drinker. Being an alcoholic all those things went by the side so I could
get drunk.
First off, I am still sober so 3 weeks now? I should really document the date better, I am thinking April 11th was my first day... I should have done it on New Years or something memorable, hmmm ok bender until Jan 30th YAY ha ha.
I actually had a wonderful weekend, gym, cleaning, yoga, cooking, work... all of which would have sounded like a terrible weekend in my drinking days! Today I was walking Jazmine through the park, and I was thinking about life etc, and I become hyper aware that I think about myself a lot now. Is this how people are? Thinking about your goals, and where you want t be etc? I am being serious... I can’t recall my previous sober days I think I was the same way. I like to think that its more the sense of hope, and looking forward to life instead of being self centered. In all seriousness is this what sober people do?
Racing
I am toying with racing, been looking into races, and so forth. I enjoy racing but hate how people take themselves so seriously at the events, people its CAT 4, and we are 30! No one is winning the race being signed by Astana and winning the Giro next season. I think it would be fun, ad give me an extra incentive to ride more, plus I really want to do cross this season so it will help me get in shape to do that in the fall. Cross seems a lot more fun since 2 laps into the race everyone is sort of in their own race instead on a huge pack jockeying for position its more broken up, where you are trying to beat the guy 50 yards a head of you. All the races I have been to have a much more jovial feel to them instead of the I am the next Lance super ego of road racing.
Goals
A few months ago I posted a few goals and really I forget what they are, and clearly they were not truly what I was looking to do with my life. I have since updated my goals list which most of them are easily obtainable.
1. There is a bike ride I found online, its not an organized ride or anything just a guy mapped his ride. It leaves from downtown Denver (5280 ft), meanders into the mountains and up Mount Evens (Highest paved road in North America at 14240 ft) its 134 miles I think and over 10,000 feet of climbing when said and done. I want to do it 3 times, July, August September once each month.
2. I want to be done with BA’s and UA’s by September 11th, I have SOME control over this goal. Staying clean, and blowing everyday, going to classes etc help, but its my PO’s decision not mine..
3. I want to be done with my therapy classes by December 14th, which if I go every week I should be done before that though I did not look to see what holidays etc might interfere, and post pone a week.
4. I want to be done with Relapse Prevention class on June 30th which if I do not miss any classes should be my final class.
5. Have my restitution paid off by September 11th 2010, I still owe 4500... but paying $400 a month in classes etc makes it tough to put money towards that debt.
Once my BA’s start dropping (hopefully the next PO meeting) I want to take the money would be
spending on that and put it into savings for either a new bike, or more than likely towards my
restitution so I can get that done and paid off.
More thoughts
I have difficulty with motivation, and purpose. Clarifying, I love to ride, but find I need a reason to go
for rides other than pleasure aka the desire to race. I went to yoga for the first time in two years, and
loved it, I really miss practicing, but again I need a reason other than enjoyment does that make any
sense? Most people love to hike, or yoga etc and go when they can, and if they miss a chance might
be disappointed. I find it difficult to be like I won’t ride today because I would rather hang out with
friends or my dog (which I did Wednesday) I feel though I am being lazy, but lazy of what? With no
goal to race etc, and really missing the ride is not going to transform my life, but I find it difficult not to
schedule everything. I am starting to try to organize everything, and do the daily planner thing which
I think is really an attempt to show I am in control of my life. That I am no longer being controlled or
manipulated by my vice of alcohol but really just by another vice either riding, or the gym, r climbing
etc. I have read quite a bit on alcoholism and recovery but do not recall ever seeing anything about
this though, to me it makes perfect sense.
Last note
Work has been going great been going in early 430-5 am which is when I have my best
concentration and leaving 1-2 which with Colorado Summers leaves me with 7+ hours of sunlight to
enjoy, it seems to be the perfect schedule for me. I have been staying sober, no real issues, really
no desire to drink, I can really tell the difference of life before compared to now. All the stupid little
things I missed like today, cooking chili, spring cleaning, yoga, walking Jazmine around the park,
Taking Jazmine to the ice cream parlor and having an ice cream, which I could have done all of
those things if I were a social drinker. Being an alcoholic all those things went by the side so I could
get drunk.
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